snugglebear1234

12:23 am	*A LONG LONG LONG TIME* Hey it's been a while over a year since I updated alot has happened the last time I've been here can't go into detail but what I can say is my life couldn't be better right now Current Mood: tired Current Music: Bless The Broken Road (Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 25th, 2006
10:03 pm	*A LONG LONG TIME* Hey everyone been awhile alot has happend need a new life need some new friends and find old ones Current Mood: depressed Current Music: Jeuse take the wheel (Comment on this)
Thursday, January 26th, 2006
7:08 am	HI Hi everyone i know it has been senice last year that i wrote in my journal i have alot to say but little time to say it all in i'm in school now working part time and hoping to get my kids back on the 10 of febuary well can't say much more got to get to class bye for now Current Mood: awake (Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 20th, 2005
11:36 am	*been awhile* hi everyone i know it has been awhile since i wrote but i have alot to say now last time i said i had a lot on my shoulders well my kids got taken out of my care put in there dads care then on the 16th got taken out of there dads care and put in a receiving home i fought all weekend long them finally on the 19th he go them back tanks to me and my fighting and his but his wife can go to hell that fucken bitch is the reason he lost my kids in the first place she lied about things. oh and i am working now at a temp agency when i can to get extra money well that is all for now bye Current Mood: exhausted Current Music: country (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 27th, 2005
12:43 am	*hmm* today and these last few weeks have been really stressful i have alot on my shoulders right now that i have to figure out how to take care of well that is all for now Current Mood: stressed Current Music: country (3 Comments \|Comment on this)
Friday, August 5th, 2005
9:36 pm	ok today is ok i am feeling alot better then i was the last time i wrote in here i am feeling overwhelmed with different things i miss alot of my old friends Current Mood: okay Current Music: country (Comment on this)
Saturday, July 16th, 2005
12:50 pm	*life* life sucks right now only because i am in bed for a while because i had my tonsils out on thursday and it hurts like a mother fucker i can't swallow without it hurting i think it might have gotten infective when they pulled them out some people like it because i can hardly talk and have trouble breathing it really does suck Current Mood: uncomfortable Current Music: country (0 Comments \|Comment on this)
Sunday, June 19th, 2005
12:01 am	*everything* hay everyone everything has been going ok for me i can't wait till the first i might get to go up to oaklahoma to see my siter and my new nices and nephew my sister had triplets on the 10th and they are still in the hospital well thatsall for now more to come later Current Mood: cranky Current Music: country (0 Comments \|Comment on this)
Friday, June 3rd, 2005
11:57 pm	*people* I have 60 days clean and sober and i almost relapsed tonight over stupid stuff but i didn't and i am glad i din't because i feel that if i would have i know i would have lost my kids and i don't want that to happen i just wish people in my house would not leave it out in the open for everyone and there momma's to see and don't expect people to take or want to take them well that is all for now Current Mood: frustrated Current Music: country (0 Comments \|Comment on this)
3:20 pm	*school* i went on a field trip to gibbeons ranch with my daughter for an end of the year bar-b-que and took my other two kids with me as well sammi and ashley got there by a friend of mine and chrissy and i rode the bus it was fun i had a really good time spending it with my girlsi don't get much time with them as it is so i took addvantege of it so over all it has been a great day thanks every one Current Mood: grateful Current Music: country (Comment on this)
Monday, May 30th, 2005
11:40 pm	*people* i really hate it when other people get into my things and my bissness and then spread it around like they know what they are talking about and they don't if you are going to read my journal make sure you read it right and know what you are saying before you say it the preson i am talking about know who he/she is so bud out would you please well i got to go for now more later ok Current Mood: pissed off Current Music: country (0 Comments \|Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 24th, 2005
8:31 am	*confused* hey i kinda hate life right now the reason i say kinda is because there are a few things i am glad about one is that i am 51 days clean and sober i am a better mother then i have ever been before i care now about what my kids are doing and saying they mean the world to me i miss this guy that i was with that i fucked up in the relationship i now know what i lost was a great guy that would do anything for me and my kids that are 5 in a half, 4 and 2 in a half there birthdays are august 3 1999, may 22 2001 and june 11 2002 and mine april 11 1978 that makes me old but this guy would never forget a birthday he might of forgoten who's but he could tell you what day and i miss him and his son alot exspeshaly now that they are gone i wish they would just come home were people love and care about them. well it is not a hole lot but it is something but i gotta go for now bye Current Mood: missing someone Current Music: don't care (0 Comments \|Comment on this)
Friday, May 20th, 2005
10:24 am	*hmm* today has been ok i have had a long 46 days of recovery i just started talking to this guy that i know again i miss him and i know even if he doesn't want to admit it he misses me to, i would love it if he would come home were he belongs my feelings for him have gotten stronger. Like the saying goes you don't know what you have lost until it is gone well now i know the meaning of that b/c i never thought i would feel this way until it was to late. The guy that i am kinda sorta with reminds me to much of my ex-husband and trust me i don't like that one bit. I regret letting this guy go b/c we had so many good times together that it was hard for me to find out he was gone. I hope he makes the right decision and does what he feels is right no matter how much it hurts other people as long as it makes him happy well that is all i have to say for now and if he happens to read this he knows who it is i am talking about. Gotta go for now bye. Current Mood: frustrated Current Music: country she's in love with the boy (Comment on this)
Monday, May 9th, 2005
6:44 am	*my day* today is mothers day i have been having a good day for now it is 4:18pm i miss my two older kids that live in west Virginia with there father and step-mother i have been 35 days clean and sober and very proud of myself i want to say hi to everyone who reads this and respond if you want to Current Mood: excited Current Music: country (0 Comments \|Comment on this)
Saturday, February 12th, 2005
2:38 pm	Tuesday, January 4th, 2005 10:45 am 2005 I know it has been a while since I have typed anything in here but i figure better late then never right Alot of things have happened since i wrote last first i divorced my husband david got with this guy named chucky engaged to be married in about 6 months or shortly after my divorce is final i am very happy now that i don't have to worry about what other people think about who i am with and who i am going to be with for the rest of my life well my kids are doing good in school and potty training we are all very happy we had a great christmas and a very very happy new year Current Mood: annoyed Current Music: country (4 Comments \|Comment on this) Monday, November 22nd, 2004 11:04 pm frusterated and scared today has been a really hard day trying to deal with everything going on in my life like with my cancer my soon to be ex husband and my man now people telling lies and starting rumors about me that are not true i am really afraid that i will end up losing the man i have now do to all of these rumors and that would kill me on top of losing my girls that would kill me first. I would hate to see what would of happened to david grimes if it was not for me saving his ass after he hit me. Well that is all for now more laster chow Current Mood: frustrated Current Music: indian outlaw (Comment on this) Sunday, October 10th, 2004 10:02 am hey it has been a really stressful time since i talked to you lets see were do i begin well things between my husband and i have gotten worse then before i love him but not in love with him all he wants is to grop me like i am a pice of meat i hate it i am in love with someone ealse and everyone that reads this and knows me knows who it is Current Mood: bitchy Current Music: country (Comment on this) Saturday, August 7th, 2004 12:18 pm life is a bitch life is a bitch then you marry one well that is the point were i am right now i am getting a devorse from my husband i know what you guys are thinking it is about time right (Comment on this) Wednesday, August 4th, 2004 12:26 am screwed it has been a very adventful day today was my daughters 5th birthday and everyone but the person she really wanted to be here was here the person she really wanted here knows who he or she is she kept talking about him or her all though out her party but i understand why that person did not show up i regreat alot of things in life well got to go later (1 Comment \|Comment on this) Saturday, July 31st, 2004 12:51 am fucked up well tonight has been one fucked up night i got into a fight with some brod and her boyfriend going over to see kenny god i miss him so much i have been seeing alot of him lately and i injoy his company but there is alot of other things i really really miss about being with him and the main thing is him being his self and me not having to stress much or at all when i am around him Current Mood: hurting (Comment on this) Wednesday, May 19th, 2004 1:35 pm no were i am not very happy because i have a splet personality that at times likes to make my life a living hell witch latly she has by doing alot of things and saying alot of things to people that should have never been said or done but hell shit happends to the best of people at times Current Mood: pissed off (1 Comment \|Comment on this) Friday, May 14th, 2004 2:28 pm today is an ok day i miss kenny alot though i know i fucked up. but everyone deserves another chance to make things right and i feel i should get another one Current Mood: pissy (Comment on this) Monday, April 26th, 2004 9:39 pm Sunday, April 25th, 2004 12:08 am today Today has been an ok day went to my brothers house for my nieces birthday party she turned two i got home and alex called and said she was going to stay the night at danny and Kristina's house so that left me and kenny here all by ourselves with just the girls and they went to bed early and i got my brains fucked out of me in two rounds i couldn't keep up with kenny i usually can but not tonight for some reason well got to go for now wright more later ok Current Mood: satisfied Current Music: Garth Brooks-to make you feel my love (Comment on this) Saturday, April 24th, 2004 6:49 am the last week and one day This last week and one day has been ok so much has happened, that i don't know how to handle it all but i think i am doing a fairly good job the only problem is that i can't sleep well right now. I have got so many things that i need to do and so little time to get them all done in. For intense i have court in Madera on Monday I am scared about going by myself but i am a big girl I know everything will be ok and that kenny will be here for me when i get back. I have got so much to do today and again so little time to do it all in I have my niece's birthday party anywhere between 12pm and 2pm i also got to go get my meds filled I am so glad that I have kenny in my life because i don't know were i would be if he wasn't. I feel that if it was not for Kenny, Alex, Zeb and Mindi helping me make the right decision that i would probably still be in an abusive relationship but i am not so i am alot better off without him. I have alot more scurity about myself then what i have had in the past. The only thing i have to work on now is my nightmares that i keep having that i can't seem to get rid of no matter how hard i try or anyone in that matter trys. I am not tired anymore i can't sleep even if i wanted to i got my oldest daughter christina and my husband well soon to be in the bed yes there is room for me but with my nightmares i am not even going to try it right now. my back is killing me right now. i am very surprised that my soon to be ex-husband did not called or e-mail me yeturday maybe he has got it that i am done with his stupied ass. as it was quoted from a movie i watched kiss my ass it is over he is a great guy but just not boyfriend material. Well the great guy part is pushing it just a little because if he was so great he would have never done or said alot of the things he did. well i don't really have much more to say so more later bye Current Mood: scared Current Music: Blake Shelton-Austin (Comment on this) Friday, April 16th, 2004 8:38 am men today is a good morning so far last night i had to do one of the hardest things i have ever done in my life. I left my husband i gave him walking papers the main 2 resons i chose my first true love is b/c my husband didn't except my kids just me and that is not fair to my 3 beautiful girls the 2 reason is that he hit me yes kenny knows about 2 times but it was more than that i just didn't want to say anything to anyone b/c i know what would have happened if i did. but i don't need to worry about that b/c i took care of it and i know i am not going to be hurt anymore. alot of people think this is just a marital, fight but i know it is not and that i made the right decision of who i wanted i miss my kids alot and they come first in my life before any body else, even myself. i am sorry if i upset some people but fuck it. it is my life and my happiness not theres so if they don't like it they can kiss my white ass. well i gotta go now bye Current Mood: tired Current Music: Trisha Yearwood- She's In Love With The Boy (Comment on this) Tuesday, April 13th, 2004 9:25 pm men today has been a great day i am husband free for the night i love evey minute of it i just got my girls down and now i am sitting here drinking i am going to have a really fun night tonight well don't have much to say so bye i love kenny Current Mood: happy Current Music: country (Comment on this) Monday, April 12th, 2004 6:18 pm confused it is april 12 of 2004 i am really confused right now because i have to guys i really care about well one more then the other there is the first one david who can be sweet one minute but a real asshole the next. Then there is kenny he is a really loving person he cares about me and my kids more then any other guy ever has i really care about him more then my own husband i know that is kinda sad but it is true. I think of kenny every night and day he is always on my mind now david on the other hand shit sometime i just want him to jump off a cliff and get out of my life he always has an exscuse for everything no matter what it is. I got into a big argument with my kids dad today and so i am just feeling real peachey NOT!!! At times i hate life and feel like i want to die but then i think of a few people that is my kids and kenny and realize i have alot to live for I never really get my space even if i tell him i need it he has to be up my ass 24/7 kenny on the other hand i tell him to leave me alone he leaves me alone and gives me my space. I don't know if kenny relizes what he means or how much he means to me. I love him to pices. I know he loves me to but can't really say it right now. I know that he is scared a little bit even if he says he is not i know he is you want to know how i know b/c i am scared of being hurt again by alot of people but i honestly belive that he will not hurt me again but that doesn't mean i can't be scared i wish i had super powers that i could be in two places at one time (Comment on this) Sunday, April 11th, 2004 3:27 am today easter and my birthday went to park and had a picnic Current Mood: hot tired Current Music: country About LiveJournal.com (Comment on this) (Comment on this)